Songs with Bitchy Opening Lines
I love a listicle. I love patterns. I love a listicle about patterns. This is a list of songs with savage opening lines.
“God Only Knows” by The Beach Boys (1966)
“I may not always love you”
Look, I’m not even sure I see a future for us, but I promise to write you a song either way. Initiate The Barbershop Quartet cover of The Beach Boys’ 1966 hit as recorded for Bioshock Infinite. Written by Brian Wilson and Tony Asher, the song is one of contradictions; of bluntness, softness, confidence, naiveté. This one is truly special.
“We’ll Sing in the Sunshine” by Gale Garnett (1966)
“I will never love you”
I guess 1966 was the year of setting boundaries: Gale Garnett tells her lover in “We’ll Sing in the Sunshine” that her father warned against committing. Yes, Gale is more than happy to experience weather patterns with you, but she’s booking it out of town the moment the sun goes down. Papa told her not to come.
“Stayin’ Alive” by The Bee Gees (1977)
“Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk I'm a woman's man, no time to talk.”
The last Beach Boy Brian Wilson recently reunited with his brothers at the record shop in the sky, and they are surely joined by the late Brothers Bee Gee, included in this list with disco’s version of “I’m walkin’ here!!”
“I Don’t Believe You” by The Magnetic Fields (2011)
“So you quote love unquote me”
Match that line with the sardonic tone of singer Stephin Merritt and you get a pretty savage starting point for a great one from The Magnetic Fields.
“Say You’ll Be There” by The Spice Girls (1997)
“Last time that we had this conversation, I decided we should be friends”
The most danceable song about getting friend-zoned starts off with a dash of spice. Sabrina Carpenter owes a lot to the cheeky ladies of pop that came before her, the fab five that belted out each tune with the brazen heat of a woman who knows what she wants and what she doesn’t.
“Gimme More” by Britney Spears (2007)
“It’s Britney, bitch”
Final word goes to the queen herself.
